Sunday, December 30, 2007

My Son: Friend of Dust Mites

Orville has taken off for a visit with Eglantine. After a short visit, he is resuming his college career after a two year hiatus for a church mission. So, he cleared all his stuff out of his room. I glanced into Orville's bare room and found a dust mite preserve. I could write my name, or maybe even write a book in the dust in that room. Evidently, Orville has taken my frequent statements that cleaning a room INCLUDES dusting as strictly advisory.

I am baffled as to why wiping a dust rag once a week over a bedside table, dresser, and tops of woodwork and heat register is such an arduous task. Possibly, Orville does not see the task as difficult, merely unnecessary? Or could he be a closet member of PETA and has deeply held beliefs dust mites have a right to live without persecution from human beings? Is there a here-to-fore unresearched link between the Y chromosome and an affinity for dust?

Perhaps some masters degree candidate will decide to research these questions. Until then, I am considering sending the Kirby Vacuum sales staff my son's address. I have this vision of the Kirby sales person's matress vacuuming demonstration. As the demonstration ends, I am sure the sales person would inform my son and roommates that their mattress lint is disgusting. The young men would look at the sale person in a puzzled manner and say, "Yeah. So?" That would be entertainment.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Antipaste

By special request:

2 c. cooked carrots
2 c. cooked cauliflower
1 c. salad oil
1 teaspoon allspice
1 c. chopped dill pickles
1 c. stuffed green olives, chopped
2 cans white drained tuna
2 c. catsup
2 11 oz. jars chili sauce
2 tablespoons lemon juice
1 clove garlic
1 c. cocktail onions (I chop these a little)
2 8 oz. cans mushrooms
2 cups frozen shrimp
1 can artichoke hearts (I chop these a little too)

Mix together and eat with crackers. I like Triscuits. Wilbur likes Wheat Thins.

Saturday, December 15, 2007

Petunia & Prudence




Here are Petunia and Prudence during their Santa-hating days.

The Santa Haters






When Petunia turned two, I thought I would never have to spend time during the Christmas season waiting in line to see Santa. She was an avowed Santa Claus hater. She could not even be in the gymnasium with him. When he would come to our church Christmas party, we had to leave. Petunia would scream "No! No!" whenever the jolly old elf came within a quarter of a mile of her. You would have thought we were showing her the "Chucky" horror movies and telling her that Chucky was Santa. Prudence followed suit. She did not like Santa any better than her sister, although she didn't scream at him quite as loudly.

After Prudence and Petunia, I decided most little kids must be afraid of Santa. Then Eglantine turned four and mentioned she would like to have her picture taken with Santa. My children/Santa theories went out the window, and I dressed up Eglantine and Hermione and took them to the mall.

So Petunia and Prudence, you have only yourselves to blame for having no pictures with Santa.


Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Wilbur's Birthday




Wilbur celebrated his birthday yesterday. Or more accurately, I celebrated Wilbur's birthday. He thinks all the to-do I make over birthdays is kind of silly. If I followed his guidance on holiday celebrations, they would be completely eliminated. Someday I might take his suggestions, "just don't buy anyone any presents" "Don't get me anything for Christmas." I have a sneaking suspicion he wouldn't really like the outcome of his own advice.

He wanted to have steak at home rather than going out. I have to agree that the steak we make at home is much better than when we eat out. We ended with a chocolate birthday cake.

As is usual for me, my chocolate layer cake strongly resembled the leaning tower of Pizza. I don't know why, but there are skills in my cooking that are completely missing. Fortunately, Wilbur's talents with a trowel is a crossover skill for frosting a cake. He wanted to repair my mess, so I turned it over to him. Then, he disagreed with my candle lighting methods and took over. Men are bossy I think. The large candles represent 10's, the smaller one represent 1's.